What a difference a day makes. One day before I wrote this, I was helpless. All my intellect and speed could not save me from becoming a liability to my group, as this evil pirate grabbed me, holding onto me as if I were a possession. Forced to release me by my party allies, he stuck a knife into me, finally dropping me. I survived; the wound wasn’t even that severe, but the wound to my already fragile pride took yet another hit. It was the minotaurs all over again. As I’d mentioned in a previous missive, those awful bovines had kept me prisoner for about three years.

Only one day later, I finally broke down and revealed my little secrets to my allies. Someone like me, a tiny, introverted gnome, has few secrets, so this was no big deal, but after three years of no privacy and being violated by said minotaurs in unimaginable ways, this was tough. They wondered why I rarely if ever used my natural gnomish illusion ability. I showed them.

Even Hussst, my new but close friend, never knew about this, not until now. Every time I used my illusion magic, there would be feedback, causing terrible headaches. I’d at first thought it was from damage caused by the constant exposure to the elements, but my research finally revealed the truth. On this day, I demonstrated. The headache was worse than ever. I thought my head would split open! The next thing I knew, I felt some kind of force emanating from my hands, and psionic energy blasted from them, hitting a tree. Now I understand. This was why magic didn’t function for me. I am a psionic being. Psionic power is very different from arcane power. It has nothing to do with The Weave. Oddly, whatever psionic “Weave” exists, it chose me without my even realizing it. The Weave did not. The headaches vanished for good, while my new psionic energy is amazing. I can damage enemies without leaving any mark, I can alter destiny in minor ways, and I suspect more is coming. I still wish magic would work for me, but fate is fickle.

Hussst was not pleased that I hid the headaches from him, but he needs to understand that I feel enough like a burden. I want to pull my weight with him and with any party I accompany, even if that weight is limited. Even I was shocked when I managed to have my weight checked in the courtyard of the town we’re in now. I am 2’9” tall, so I should be slim, but…18 pounds? I never thought there could be a gnome who needed to GAIN weight, but here I am. Hussst basically made me promise to go home and present myself to my family in exchange for his forgiveness, so I finally agreed to try. Just as I’d expected, it did not go well.

The voyage began after I parted with Hussst. I was in turmoil. This action would likely traumatize my family. Hadn’t they suffered enough? Besides losing their son, they likely felt guilty for whatever they did that influenced me to leave town. I could assure them that the decision was mine alone, so maybe this was not such a bad idea after all. It would have to wait, though, because a mob of panicked humans suddenly charged at, then by me. I tried to find out what was going on, but they would not stop. I finally managed to latch onto one, and he informed me that a monster had invaded the library just a furlong or two away. For once, I found my courage. These humans might have been larger and stronger than I was, but I am an adventurer, possessed of skills they could only dream of having.

Steeling myself, I crept into the library…and promptly lost my courage again. There was indeed a monster in the library; of all things, a minotaur! I could feel my legs quaking as I prepared to use my new psionic “knives”, when I recognized him. His eyes shone with intelligence unheard of in this species. His face seemed almost gentle. It was Khroton Sharphorn, the minotaur who had first sympathized with my plight when I was his tribe’s prisoner, then freed me!

 I asked him his purpose, and he explained that he was trying to help uncover the cause of this abominable cold spell. My shock only grew as he told me that this cold weather has existed for 50 years, showing me a book he had perused. This confirmed the rumor. Maybe my parents or grandparents can tell me stories about when the town and the world was warmer. At 18 years of age, I barely knew what “heat” was!

Khroton decided to leave so as not to frighten more people, but I suggested that he simply try to be friendly. He is an intelligent being now, and I have to believe that humans don’t judge by race. Unfortunately, that is not true in my town, once known as Xynnar, now Oceanus. King Myrrikan III is not only racist but misogynous and cruel to those who love beings not of the same race and not of the opposite gender. He apparently forgot that Xynnar, the town’s TRUE name in my opinion, belonged to us gnomes before his humans stepped foot in it. We had no objection to sharing the land, but we never allowed him or his ilk to annex it! I can only hope that he receives justice for his evil actions.

I walked to the local shipyard and bought passage on a nice-looking vessel, The Courier. The human captain and crew were pleasant, but there wasn’t time for small talk, and I am not the type anyway. I did not assist the crew despite the fact that doing so would have reduced the fairly steep price I paid. How could I, at my size? I think they understood. I made sure not to get in the way.

Luckily, I had some books to read, and yes, the view was wonderful—if not for the cold. Even the ship rooms felt like being in an extended Cone of Cold spell! If this continues, nobody will survive. I wish I had brought my new boots. They are magical and insulate me from the cold. I also bought a Bag of Tricks from the same Shoppe. I love this thing! I can pull a fuzzy object out of the rust-colored bag, toss it about 20 feet away, and it becomes an animal I can command!

I also finally found the time to conjure my new familiar—an owl. Oh! I forgot to mention this: Soon after my psionic powers manifested, I’d gone to the library to read. There was even a book of magic, and I could now understand it! I can now cast spells—not like a true wizard, but spells that can be cast in ritual form through a book I purchased from that same Magic Shoppe.

Hussst shared a spell he knew called Guiding Bolt, which I added to my new book, along with Find Familiar and Identify. I also purchased a scroll enabling me to learn what might be the best ritual spell in existence: Tiny Hut. Now my party and I can sleep safely under almost any conditions!

 Maybe there are indeed gods, because if there are, they certainly protected the ship during this voyage. I thought I saw some shapes in the water, but they had no interest in us. The only encounters we had were a breaching whale and a pack of dolphins. I wonder…could they have been more than what they seemed? The dolphins in particular seemed to be in no hurry to leave us. Could they have been protecting us?

Several days later, the ship arrived at Xynnar’s…Oceanus’…dock. After a quick search and having to pay some new taxes, I used my memory to navigate back to the Healing Hall (humans use the term “Infirmary”). When there was a moment with no people in sight, I found and opened the hidden trap door. I discovered my old home and entered. There was no turning back now.

There were my parents, Seebo and Donella. I slowly approached and announced myself…only to be grabbed and nearly strangled, my father’s face red with rage! Somebody even smacked me across the room. Why were they angry? I tried to explain myself, but to no avail. In pain and mental anguish, I dimly realized that Father was using the word “imposter”! I begged them to give me a chance to explain, and I did so, giving my full name and disclosing information that only a family member would know.

I guess I convinced them, because the violence turned into hugs, kisses, and a different form of anger. The latter was understandable, but I explained what happened, even offering to undergo a Zone of Truth spell. They believed me—or so I assume. I promised I would return, but I had a mission to perform. They understood but demanded that I keep in touch.

My, how my twin brother Zook has grown! He might even reach 4 feet. I wonder why I am so “stunted,” even by gnome standards. However, the real shock was the face that greeted me next. It was my grandfather, “Noodles”! He had been nicknamed that because his nose is shaped more like a noodle than the bulbous form most of us have. He likes it.

As I babbled and we hugged, I nearly broke down, sobbing how much I’d missed him. Grandfather was the one person who truly understood me. He, too, is a bit introverted. Maybe I got that from him.

One oddity: He was dead! He had died about three years before my ill-fated trip out of town. I know about resurrection, but from what I understood, he had died in a place where his body might not even have been found, let alone returned to life! He should have been a bard because he told the wildest story, talking about some Yule entity who had resurrected him and others to go on a mission, in exchange being allowed to resume their lives.

I could not stay long, but in the time we shared, bonds were restored. Some of my family wanted to physically restrain me from going on my mission, but I convinced them that I’d been chosen for the task. “You’re exaggerating, Brokk,” one uncle scolded. I then realized that in a bizarre way, he was right. It was not that cold here!

I explained that it is much colder outside, only to find that it was not! It felt like early winter, not the frigid temperatures I had experienced elsewhere. I tried to explain myself again, this time going to a cleric to have my story verified. Our sage, an elf named Ara, promised to research the issue. I think we need to do the same. Why is Oceanus much warmer than any other place?

I did receive wonderful news, though: that awful king is gone! Our new king, Aradan, has repealed all the odious laws, and Oceanus is a much happier place. Females are even allowed to work now, and best of all, magic is no longer prohibited. Rumor has it that the king himself is or was a wizard.

The stories I’ve heard are incredible, especially the one that explained my family’s initial hostility. It seems that an imposter had disguised him or herself as our extended family member Thorn Ropewalker’s mother, manipulating then-10-year-old Thorn into leaving his family to go adventuring! He did, and apparently, he has done well.

I wish I had more time to tour my town and find out why Zook and our cousin, Giglara, seem so depressed lately. We have a new counselor, someone from the North named Sergei Kulenov. Maybe he can provide some details, but there isn’t time now. I must return to my allies and tell them about this “sinkhole of moderation” I have discovered.

One epilogue to this adventure has finally lifted me out of my funk. One of my extended family, an artificer, was puttering around with an invention, probably a new magic item for our ACME company, and I realized that I understood what he was saying and what he was doing! I asked if I could help. He was reluctant since I’d shown no artificer skills before, but he agreed. I could do it! I can imbue small objects with magic! When I advance in power next, if I ever do, I’m going to become an artificer. I could be an armorer or a battlesmith, mitigating my overwhelming weaknesses. For the first time in years, maybe ever, I am excited about life.